Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Lotsa Thinking

(Written on November 11th, 2008)

I did a lot of thinking on the drive home and trying to be positive and thankful for all the blessings in my life. I thought back to a conversation I had last night with my husband Paul. I was so worried he would be upset about the expense, but he could tell quickly that was what I was thinking because I said I just can’t put her down right now, and he said don’t think for a minute that he would ever want to put her down. I was so relieved. He knows how much Nova means to me. I am thankful to have a spouse who understands this. It’s only money, and although we can’t afford to pay for all this in full right now, we can easily pay it off over time (I haven’t carried a balance on my credit card for years, but will have to for awhile now.) I know there are many people in much worse financial situations. Just another thing to be thankful for.

I also thought back to Monday night at the Cross Country banquet. Tammy and I connected after the banquet and she laughed because Nova's tail came up in one of the pictures in the team slide show. I told her that the amputation was the following day and that I was so sad that Nova would not be able to be the cross country mascot dog that fall. The tears were welling up, but she got a big smile on her face and said Nova would definitely attract more attention and love than ever if she continued to go to the meets as a Tripawd. I didn't realize until then that I was assuming that Nova would not be able to go, but when you think about it, of course she can. If she is healthy by the summer I will continue to take her to the park races and team meets.

I think people are much more afraid of amputations than dogs are. Dogs don’t care. If it makes them feel better, they adapt, and get on with life. I wish people were better at doing that. As I remember with Milhouse, our Dalmation, it is so very shocking to have the dog come home with no leg, and you feel absolutely awful the first few times you see them struggle to get up, or lose their balance and fall over. It just rips your heart out. But very quickly you see the difference, and how happy they are and you see it is worth it. We did the amputation with Milhouse knowing it had already spread, and that it was only buying us a few months. With Nova it seems more promising because it hasn’t spread, and the chemo has a good chance of knocking out any microscopic stuff that might be there.

When I got home I spent a lot of time on the site. I did a ton of reading and even added a post telling Nova's story and asking a few questions. I had been wanting to search online for a type of harness to put on her to help her in and out of the car and up and down stairs. It was amazing, as soon as I opened the Tripawds site, there was a video promoting and demonstrating a harness made just for that purpose. I ordered one on the spot.

I had to keep myself occupied while I waited for news that she had made it through the surgery safely.

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